Better Late Than Never...

So I don't really know what to say—I just know God is all over these little tid bits we're all contributing, and I have really been convicted and hit with a lot of ‘mercy’ this week. Am I living a life that points directly to Jesus or a life that points to my decency as a human being? I mean what do people see in me, am I a Jesus or am I just nice. I used to think that the concept of preaching through action rather than words was my best bet (I believe it was St. Francis that said to “convert the world by obedience to the Holy Rule rather by example than by word”), but this approach has just been too timid. Either I need to be an amazing example or start talking. I think I've lived under the mentality of "if I act like a good person, read the bible, and do the right thing, that counts as Christian and thus effective/influential", but that just doesn’t cut it. If I’m not going to say whom I live for aloud, then my actions should be shouting it, but they’re kind of just mumbling praise to God. I need to take actions that merit questions and the engagement of those around me; but I really didn't/don’t sacrifice, serve or love to the extent that people wonder why—it’s not enough to warrant such interest from all of whom I interact with. I always think I'm doing alright and living a decent example, then God's word hits me like a slap in the face—albeit a loving one.

Honestly, I started writing this last night and left posting it until this evening, and lo and behold, Corinthian’s 3:18 pops up the next morning. This week, I’ve constantly been reminded that I should take myself less seriously, and to do so, I should really stop thinking about my mere example, and rather seek to build up the Godly qualities I see in other people. One verse that I try to remember daily is Hebrews 3:13, “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” My words often fall short of this when I’m around people making unhealthy decisions because I’ve never thought of encouragement in those situations—honestly I’ve generally just tried not to come off judgmental and love them anyway, but is this allowing or even causing them to stumble? If I were to encourage them in God’s image rather than the worlds, would they question themselves in the world’s image? God doesn’t call us to judge one another, so I try not to, but he also calls us to speak. My timid/meek approach to this aspect of my faith is becoming a hindrance to my growth and thus the growth of those I speak to. I loved Tuesday’s meditation on how ‘Christ breaks my self-doubt, timidity, and fear and establishes in you the courage, resolve, and restlessness to live in absolute freedom of expression’; if I really love Him, I’m going to have to tap into the freedom I have in him. I’ve been growing more open to the conversations about my faith, and in them I’ve found myself humbled in my own lack of knowledge, but moreover, I’ve also felt God moving.

Lord, help me to live a life worth questioning and encourage daily. You say, “Whoever listens to you listens to me” (Luke 10:16)—please drench my words with your love and encouragement for others. My hope is in you. Thanks.